Being a woman is not an easy task. Vulnerability surrounds us. Pain surrounds us, and judgment is based on what we are. It means being constantly bullied, shamed, cat-called, pushed aside, lied to, diminished and hurt.
Being a Woman is expecting the perfect body type, the perfect figure, the perfect face, the perfect housewife, the perfect mother, the perfect lover, the perfect everything when we know it’s impossible and constantly face criticism.
Being a woman also means having other women bring us down It’s judging the other mothers, our other friends, our co-workers.
Having lived my whole life as a bigger girl, this body has has had a negative impact on me. It has taught me;
- That “friends” can use me
- That it doesn’t deserve love
- That it doesn’t deserve a fair salary
- That it doesn’t deserve basic respect
- That it doesn’t deserve to not have ignorant comments
- That it doesn’t deserve nice clothes (which is happily changing now)
- That it doesn’t deserve certain jobs
- That it’s ok to diminish hours at work so that someone prettier can get more.
Being a woman today with social media is even worse. Children today grow up hating themselves before even hitting puberty. They grow fearing their bodies and hurting themselves to try to please a society that doesn’t care.
Body Positivity and Acceptance
This is why women today are working hard on Body Positivity and Acceptance. Body Positivity is coming from all sizes and it’s not about asking you to fall in love with something you’re not attracted to. It seems to be the biggest misunderstanding in this.
I, as a plus size woman, am NOT expecting you to find me attractive. You are allowed to be attractive to who you want and have your type. We all do. What I AM expecting from you is basic human respect. It’s to stop the name calling and the hate. It’s to just look the other way and continue on with your life, like when you see another guy. When I talk to you, it’s for you not to diminish me, because I am a social person who loves to get to know people, don’t worry, I am not trying to hit on you.
Body shaming does not work in helping people lose weight, if it did, nobody on this planet would be big. Happiness is the cure, this is what will give us energy. Being happy will make us want to get out more and try new things. Happiness will have the biggest effect, but hurtful people refuse to allow us to have happiness. And those who hurt others, deal with hurt as well, because no happy person will destroy another person, it’s a vicious cycle and those people don’t know how to deal with their pain.
Being a Woman
Being a woman is asking you to let us wear our swimsuits at the beach. To not make us feel uncomfortable whether you’re attracted to us or not. It’s to show respect and kindness. It’s allowing a child growing up to love themselves and in a healthy environment.
As women, we should be working together to make being a woman a healthy stage. We should NOT be hurting others but supporting each other. We should be standing strong, and protecting our children from this pain and push our vulnerability aside. Being a woman means giving their crowns. If we stand together, we can accomplish so much more. Standing together we become unbreakable. Standing together, we can fight for what we deserve. We should accept our differences because no one is perfect, but if society asks so much, maybe we should stand together and refuse these false expectations.
A woman can conquer so much. As a woman, we are constantly hurt, but we love the hardest. Our appearance decides if we are to be hired, but we are the hardest workers. We are played and hurt, but we forgive the hardest. We are lied to, and yet we trust the hardest. We would do anything to defend those we love, so why aren’t we working together to defend each other? Being a woman means we know what we can accomplish, let’s stop diminishing each other, but most importantly, ourselves.
Let’s change Being a Woman. Let’s show that we are a force that shouldn’t be reckoned with. Let’s be the best selves that we can be at any body type. Let’s stop society from defining us based on our appearance. Allow us to love ourselves because we all deserve happiness My weight does not define who I am as a person, it doesn’t make me a dangerous human being. It doesn’t make me a target to name-calling and hate. It doesn’t give anyone the right to take away my happiness.